OG Outfitters
by Ms. Selly
Summary: In the market for an Opera Ghost? Nowhere can you find quality and craftsmanship like O.G. Outfitters! Accessories selection up
1. Cover Letter

Dear Valued Customer,

For years, our team at O.G. Outfitters has provided you with high quality Opera Ghosts for all your musical and haunting needs. Our fine products have been available through our popular catalogue. However, we are now pleased to inform you that, for the first time, you may order the Opera Ghost of your choosing through our comprehensive website. No calls are necessary; all orders can be placed and processed online. We are thrilled to invite you to help us usher in this new era in O. G. Outfitters' successful reign at the top of the industry. Nowhere else can you find Opera Ghosts of the same style, talent, and ability that you find in our warehouse. And now you are able to find them in even more places, with convenience heightened to the next level. We cordially invite you to hasten to our website: http/ There you will find not only new ease and streamlined ordering services, but several new and exciting improvements to our already spectacular line of products. We have also opened a new and improved 24-hour hotline: 1-800-OPERA to help you with all Customer Service and Troubleshooting. There is always someone here to help you attain our complete satisfaction guarantee.

Sincerely,

Mme. Giry

Founder and CEO of O.G. Outfitters


	2. Select Model

**Welcome to O.G. Outfitters Online!**

Simply follow the steps to create and order the Opera Ghost to suit your needs and desires.

**STEP 1: SELECT A MODEL**

We have several high quality models available. Simply click on your desired model for a more detailed description.

The Most Popular Models:

Michael Crawford!Phantom: -PERENNIAL FAVORITE!- Always a classic for music lovers.

Lon Chaney!Phantom: -CLASSIC!- Beloved by purists and new fans alike. NOTE: The Lon Chaney!Phantom is silent, and comes with a limited selection of modes.

Gerard Butler!Phantom: -BEST SELLER!- Our newest model, great for those more interested in a romantic Ghost.

YOU HAVE SELECTED…Gerard Butler!Phantom PROCEED?

THE GERARD BUTLER!PHANTOM

Although the Gerard Butler!Phantom is our newest model (First introduced in December 2004), he has quickly become a massive hit among customers. One of the least physically deformed of our models, he is nevertheless an extremely mentally unstable genius.

The Gerard Butler!Phantom comes standard with the following accessories:

One (1) Organ

Three (3) Reams of Parchment

One (1) White Half-mask

One (1) Black wig

One (1) bottle of ink

One (1) pen

One (1) skull seal

Two (2) gallons of red wax

One (1) Opera House diorama

One (1) 'Christine' mannequin

One (1) Wedding dress and veil

A Bazillion (xxx) Candles

One (1) Gondola

One (1) Cape (with 'Swirling Dramatic Action' ®)

One (1) 'Red Death/Spanish Inquisition' Masquerade costume

WARNING: Your Gerard Butler!Phantom will be extremely attached to his mask and wig. Any attempt to remove or handle them could cause severe consequences.

YOUR SELECTION IS Gerard Butler!Phantom. PROCEED?


	3. Select Mode

**STEP 2: SELECT A MODE**

The mode you select for your Gerard Butler!Phantom will determine his dominant mood and actions. Read each description thoroughly and choose carefully to insure your Gerard Butler!Phantom perfectly matches your needs. You may select one (1) SPECIFIC MODE and one (1) GENERAL MODE.

NOTE: Secondary modes may be programmed for an additional fee. For more information, please visit Orders And Pricing

SPECIFIC MODES

CHOICE 1: 'ANGEL OF MUSIC' MODE

Dominant Mood: Commanding

Secondary Moods: Pleased, amused, seductive

While in 'ANGEL OF MUSIC' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Mock fops

Scold

Appear in mirrors

Lure impressionable objects of obsession

Sing

CHOICE 2: 'THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA' MODE

Dominant Mood: Pleased

Secondary Moods: Seductive, sophisticated

While in 'THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Steer his gondola

Lead a horse (FOR PURCHASING INFORMATION, PLEASE VISIT 'Additional Accessories')

Attempt to woo impressionable objects of obsession

Be pleased with himself

Sing

CHOICE 3: 'MUSIC OF THE NIGHT' MODE

Dominant Mood: Seductive

Secondary Moods: Romantic, Hopeful

While in 'MUSIC OF THE NIGHT' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Walk

Caress

Attempt to woo impressionable objects of obsession

Bare his soul

Sing

CHOICE 4: 'ALL I ASK OF YOU' MODE

Dominant Mode: Hurt

Secondary Moods: Enraged, vengeful, depressed

While in 'ALL I ASK OF YOU' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Spy

Weep

Crush roses

Swear vengeance

Sing

CHOICE 5: 'MASQUERADE' MODE

Dominant Mood: Smug

Secondary Moods: Angry, bossy

While in 'MASQUERADE' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Present operas

Mock all who displease him

Exert authority over objects of obsession

Demonstrate power of trapdoors

Sing

CHOICE 6: 'POINT OF NO RETURN' MODE

Dominant Mood: Seductive

Secondary Moods: Hopeful, commanding

While in 'POINT OF NO RETURN' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Strangle obnoxious leads

Grope objects of obsession

Be extremely seductive

Propose to objects of obsession with his archrival's ring

Sing

NOTE: All Gerard Butler!Phantom models purchased with 'POINT OF NO RETURN' Mode programmed will also come standard with one (1) Zorro mask and Don Juan costume.

CHOICE 7: 'DOWN ONCE MORE' MODE

Dominant Mood: Enraged

Secondary Moods: Depressed, traumatized

While in 'DOWN ONCE MORE' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Feel sorry for himself

Attempt to force objects of obsession to marry him

Tie up and threaten archrival

Have emotional breakdowns

Sing

**WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!**

**While in 'DOWN ONCE MORE' Mode, your Gerard Butler!Phantom will be in an extremely volatile and aggressive mood.**

**In accordance with company policy and bylaw 666PTO, we would like to remind you that O.G. Outfitters cannot be held responsible for any damage caused by our Opera Ghosts, including but not limited to: physical or psychological damage to user, physical or psychological damage to any who come in contact with Gerard Butler!Phantom, damage to Opera Houses, damage to divas, damage to chandeliers, damage to reputations, damage to family tombs, etc.**

GENERAL MODES

CHOICE 1: 'NOTE WRITING' MODE

Dominant Mood: Annoyed

Secondary Moods: Amused, commanding

While in 'NOTE WRITING' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Write notes

Amuse himself

Mock the recipient

Give orders

Sing

CHOICE 2: 'ROMANTIC' MODE

Dominant Mood: Seductive

Secondary Moods: Sophisticated, hopeful

While in 'ROMANTIC' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Attempt to woo objects of obsession

Create masterpieces

Grope

Caress

Sing

CHOICE 3: 'CREATIVE' MODE

Dominant Mood: Pleased

Secondary Moods: Romantic, sophisticated

While in 'CREATIVE' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Create masterpieces

Attempt to woo objects of obsession

Write notes

Plot

Sing

CHOICE 4: 'VENGEFUL' MODE

Dominant Mood: Enraged

Secondary Moods: Furious, clever

While in 'VENGEFUL' Mode, Gerard Butler!Phantom will:

Plot

Sneak through secret passageways

Cause 'accidents'

Strangle

Sing

**WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! **

**While in 'VENGEFUL' Mode, your Gerard Butler!Phantom will be in an extremely volatile, aggressive and sneaky mood. All customers who select this option should remember O. G. Outfitters takes no responsibility for any damages caused by Gerard Butler!Phantom and would like to remind you to keep your hand at the level of your eyes.**

YOU HAVE CHOSEN Choice 6: 'POINT OF NO RETURN' Mode and Choice 3 'CREATIVE' Mode. PROCEED?


	4. Select Accessories

**STEP 3: SELECT EXTRA ACCESSORIES**

Although the Gerard Butler!Phantom comes standard with many exciting and useful accessories, there are several additional accessories you may purchase if you choose.

Most Popular

Horse: Very useful for users who have selected 'PHANTOM OF THE OPERA' Mode. Requires hay, water and stable (Not Included)

Mirrors: In previous times, the Gerard Butler!Phantom has come standard with several mirrors. Although they are useful interaction tools, it has been discovered they can induce a severely agitated state in your Gerard Butler!Phantom. Studies have also shown that a Gerard Butler!Phantom exposed to mirrors for prolonged periods of time has a 70 chance of switching to 'VENGEFUL' Mode. PURCHASE AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Refills of ink, sealing wax, and parchment: Often absolutely necessary during 'NOTE WRITING' Mode, and helpful for 'CREATIVE' Mode.

Noose/'Magical Lasso': Another accessory that previously came standard. However, it has been recalled due to high casualty figures. This accessory is not available to users who have a Gerard Butler!Phantom set to 'DOWN ONCE MORE' or 'VENGEFUL' mode. PURCHASE AT YOUR OWN RISK

Zorro Mask and Don Juan Costume: This comes standard for users who have selected 'POINT OF NO RETURN' Mode. However, other users may choose to purchase it to further heighten the sex appeal of their Gerard Butler!Phantom.

Other Clothing: There are many other outfits available for the Gerard Butler!Phantom. For a complete list, please click here. WARNING! A Gerard Butler!Phantom DRESSED IN NON-COMPATIBLE CLOTHING WILL SELF DESTRUCT. ONLY DRESS YOUR Gerard Butler!Phantom IN O. G. OUTFITTERS APPROVED CLOTHING!

Click here to see a full list of accessories.

YOU HAVE SELECTED Ink and Parchment Refill. PLACE ORDER?

CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE SUCCESSFULLY ORDERED THE FOLLOWING:

Gerard Butler!Phantom

'POINT OF NO RETURN' and 'CREATIVE' Mode

Ink and Parchment Refill

If you have any questions about your order, please click here or call our Customer Service Line at 1-800-OPERA.


End file.
